Chaos breeds order. The past few months of mine have been a mess. A beautiful, perfect mess.
I have traveled to dozens of new cities and got myself in some pretty tricky situations. I am thousands of miles from home. I want to do everything, yet miss nothing. I have no tangible goals, yet I am aiming really high.
I went from strict routine – calendaring my days, tracking my productivity, measuring my output – to no plans at all – wandering around and getting lost.
My former self would call this chaos.
My future self will say that this is how I best find order.
Back in January, before I left for abroad, I completely flipped the script. I closed down my business that I started last semester (that was doing really really well). I cut out obligations and responsibilities.
I made the past few months about me and me only. Selfishly, I wanted to make this experience as fun, challenging and unique as possible. I recognized that this was truly a once in a life time opportunity.
I was not going to let $, unwanted responsibilities, hell, even sleeping, get in the way for this. I knew that this would be a formative few months (probably underestimated as well) – but now I know just how valuable it is to throw yourself in a chaotic lifestyle only to come out with order.
A few months from my writing, I will be back in San Francisco. I will be interning at a startup. Probably waking up every day at the same time, to a similar routine, optimizing my attention. I will be setting up dozens of meetings a week. I will be excited to launch features, ship products and work with incredible people.
I love that. I am deeply excited for that.
But today…sitting in Asia…I am happy with where I am.
This is once in a lifetime.